Saturday, October 3, 2009

Ass Talk


By Leo and Ms. Mae

Vocabulary: "a hole in a wall", wiseass, butt kisser, a pain in the ass, butt in, kick one's ass, jackass, not know to wipe one's own ass, to cover one's asshole, up to one's throat, bust one's ass to do sth., big honcho, put one's ass on the firing line, morass, a kick-ass job, backbreaker,

Xiao Ming and Xiao Hong are having dinner at “a hole in a wall.”

Xiao Ming: This tastes like ass.

Xiao Hong: That’s because you are eating a chicken ass. I thought you liked them.

Xiao Ming: Don’t be such a wiseass. How was your day?

Xiao Hong: It was crummy.

Xiao Ming: What happened?

Xiao Hong: I’ve told you about immediate boss, the one with the big fat buttocks, she is a real two-faced bitch. She has been shoving all her work on me and grabbing all the credit from the big boss. She is such a butt kisser!

Xiao Ming: I didn’t know she was such a pain in the ass for you!

Xiao Hong: What’s more, she butts into whatever I do, pretending to be helpful and friendly, all the time trying to make points for herself. When I watch her waggle her fat behind around, it makes me want to kick her in the fanny. Oh, let’s forget it. Tell me about your day.

Xiao Ming: Well, mine sucked. You know that jackass on my team who doesn’t even know how to wipe his own ass? He mixed up all the files that are due and I will have to cover his asshole. Besides that I am up to my throat in my own assignments, so I’ve got to bust ass to get all of them done by Friday, or else the big honcho will put my ass on the firing line. How do we get ourselves out of this morass?

Xiao Hong: You know, you really have a kick-ass job that many people would kill for.

Xiao Ming: Yours isn’t such a backbreaker, either. I always thought that you have a cushy position.

Xiao Hong: I guess the truth is, we are really better off than most people. Our complaints don’t compare to most others. So we should thank our lucky stars that we even have jobs.

Vocabulary Explanations:

ass, buttocks, butts, tush, cheeks, fanny, rear, rear end, behind, posterior...

a hole in a wall

to taste/look/smell like ass


ass/butt kisser

a pain in the ass

butt in

kick one's ass;
put some's ass on the (firing) line/sling; chew up one's ass


who cannot wipe his own ass

to cover one's asshole

be up to one's throat

bust ass to do sth.

a kick-ass job